Songs

Everyone should have a song to greet them in the morning. This morning Millie sang and clapped the greeting song from her daycare to me as I got her dressed:

"Good morning Mommy, good morning mommy, good morning mommy- it's nice to have you hear."

It's nice to be here.

Give it back.

In the last couple weeks, our daughter has been coming home from daycare saying things like, "Sophie take the coat off."

She's been in a class with the same kids for over a year now and actually Sophie is one of her favorites- I think. Whenever you ask her, "Ready to go to school?" She looks up at you thoughtfully then responds excitedly, "Sophie! Cole!" Like she can't wait to see them. When I dropped her off, these same kids would actually drop what they are doing to run across the room- saying my daughters name with glee and giving her a huge hug. My daughter was never really receptive. She would brace herself and accept the hug but it wasn't necessarily returned. The next thing this other little girl would do is start trying to help my daughter off with her coat.

So when she started saying "Sophie take the coat off." I'm thinking she just doesn't want Sophie taking off her coat. Nothing new. Then recently it turned into- "Sophie take the rattle." "Sophie take the toy." Today, I had the luxury of going to her daycare and hanging out for a couple hours. While I was there the 6 two year olds in the room were relatively well behaved. Every now and then though, Sophie would walk up to my daughter and gently remove whatever she was playing with and walk away with it to play with it herself. My daughter would say, sadly, "Give it back." To be honest, there was no struggle. When the other girl tried to take it, my daughter easily relinquished it. It's like she didn't quite know how to say, "Not finished yet," or something to that effect. On the occasions I saw, the teachers were elsewhere. So I think to myself, "It Takes a Village," so I stepped in and said, "Sophie, that's not nice. We share with our friends and take turns. Give it back." If she didn't, I would gently take it and give it back to my kid.

So this evening my husband and I are anxiously trying to decide how to handle this. To be honest, I bet Sophie keeps doing this because they are buddies (as much as two year olds can be) and she wants to play with whatever my daughter is playing with.

So far we've considered the following: 1) Mention this to her teacher so she can keep a close eye on them and teach Sophie how not to bully and our daughter how to handle it. Or 2) Teach her how to tell her teacher that someone took her toy. Or 3) Teach her how to go up to the offender, take back the toy, and say "NOT your turn yet." That last one was my preference. Frankly, my little piggie is of a size that for now, I think she can hold her own. I know though that I should not be trying to teach her 2 year old hand-to-hand combat. Ahh, play ground turmoil-- already? Why can't we all just get along?

The Good, the Bad, the Amazing

Dawn of a new day on the morning of the Inauguration. Our view...

Well, we made it there. My husband changed his mind. However, he said he preferred that we all go together on the condition that we spent the night in our own bed rather than at his friends house one mile north of the mall. He preferred that we set out at 3am (what is it with men and wanting to leave at 3am for trips) and head into DC the morning of the Inauguration. I decided that it was worth it to go together even if it meant arriving 10 hrs early.*

So, we left our home at 3:30am. Traffic was already backed up for miles at the first Metro station for DC. We abandoned the 1st station and drove one station closer to the city where the line was shorter- only 1/4 mile. We ended up parking on the street (score!) and walking for the station. In the station more lines for Metro tickets- I thanked my practical husband for getting our tickets the day before. We flew past the line and onto a train.

We were on the mall by 6am. We got a sweet spot- probably 50 ft back from the fenced in ticketed area, right next to a Jumbotron TV screen. To our east a clear and beautiful view of The Capitol building (see our picture above!), to our west, a clear and beautiful view of the Washington monument.

Our initial plan was to scout out the area whenever we arrived and then head inside somewhere to stay warm until 9 or 10 am. Then we would come back outside to wait for the Swearing In. At 6am, the Mall was already getting congested and the buildings weren't opening to allow people to warm up until 8 or 10am. So we decided to stay put... bad idea jeans, we should've stuck to our plan. It started off well enough- they handed out free flags which our daughter loved waving around. By 8:30, though, she reached her limit and was just through. She was tired but couldn't fall asleep in the backpack child-carrier like she normally can on trips. Too much excitement, too cold to fully relax, too many people. Just too much. Total meltdown- she refused to keep her gloves on, tears and snot were flying everywhere.

We decided to head home. We had agreed ahead of time that if she totally lost it, we would bring her home.

We ducked into a hotel on the way back to the train station because she just couldn't go another block. People were looking at us and our screaming child- I worried that they were going to call Child Protective Svcs. Thank God the hotel was very hospitable to those seeking warmth and shelter. I settled into a cozy lounge chair and tried to warm up her cold little hands and feet. Within minutes she was comfortable and asleep on my lap. She slept well until some daft elderly woman approached gently, leaned into her sweet sleeping face and yelled "Isn't she cute- SOUND ASLEEP!!" After which of course, she was no longer asleep. Thanks. We packed back up and headed home. We were home by 11:30am- in time to watch the main event in the comfort of our home.

So overall, I think we had the best of both worlds-- we were there, we felt the love, we felt the excitement, we felt the hope, we have a couple pictures. Our daughter will be able to say she was there and waved her flag and learned how to say "O-BA-MA!". Then we went home and watched each delicious moment of the Swearing-In from the comfort of our home while she slept in her dads arms.

In the end, my dear practical husband said he has no regrets and he's glad we went. I'm glad too. I truly hope my daughter looks back on these times as the years when it seemed like Obama was president forever... the same way I feel about Reagan (I could've sworn he was president like 16 years). I'm so glad she was there on The Mall to greet history.

*He was right by the way. We later learned it was nearly impossible for people to get to the mall from the north due to two checkpoints on the parade route. Most people who tried to come from that direction eventually ended up giving up and turning around after hours of waiting.*

Inauguration

This is the inauguration of my blog. And- as it so happens, it coincides with the inauguration of our next president. Which has raised an interesting issue in our lives as new parents.

My husband and I are quite excited about the presidential election outcome. We went to quite an activist undergraduate institution- Oberlin. But I admit, I've probably been guilty of feeling activist by nature of knowing others who have been more active. We recycle and give money... but pretty low impact stuff.

We live close to DC and we have debated the practical logistics of actually going down to the mall and being a part of the inauguration. Before we had a kid,we may have actually debated the practicalities of such a decision for just the two of us with a lively but fun debate. If we had disagreed- I might have done my thing and let him do his thing. Now that we have a toddler- this multiplies both the Pros and the Cons of going. It will be cold-30F . It will be crowded-estimated 2 million. It could even be dangerous- 2 million cranky cold travelers. On the other hand: It is is historic. It could be amazing. We will never have this particular chance again. We will have pictures- she will be able to say she was there on the Mall on that day.

Having a partner that disagrees now turns a fun and lively debate into a passionate disagreement between two parents who both want what's best for their kid but have diametrically opposed opinions on how that is best accomplished. He says I should go alone- but for me it's about sharing this moment in history with her. What to do when one parent wants to take her somewhere that the other parent disagrees with. Legally, I think if I took her out of state or something that would be parental kidnapping. See how one disagreement in how you spend the day takes on the level of a felony when there is a child involved?

So in sum:
PRE-CHILD: Parent 1: "Hey, Wanna go do something wacky?"
Parent 2: "No."
Parent 1: "Ok, I'll go on my own. See ya."
Parent 2: "Ok, Thinks to self, "Boy I love that girl and her wacky ways."
End result: Neither individual is remotely perturbed by the outcome.

POST-CHILD: Parent 1:"Hey, Wanna go do something wacky with our child?"
Parent 2: "No. Absolutely not- are you insane?!"
Parent 1: "Ok, I'm going and I'm bringing her. This is important. How could you not see that!"
Parent 2: "Go alone."
Parent 1: "No, I need to share this with her and you-- but if you refuse, I'll at least share it with her. If you deprive her of this opportunity, I don't know if I will ever forget it."
End Result: Each person is deeply hurt and disturbed by the entire discussion and wonders when the insane alien replaced their spouse.

As one friend put it: "Hmmmm...hours and hours on trains, in cold, no nap..... vs. lifelong memories of unparalleled historic event."

What to do.